terriamon:

having a body is fuck

sappharah:

my skills include reading an entire page of an academic text without absorbing a single word

sitcorn:

“yeah, everything’s fine, i just tucked your kid into bed. but can i cover up the clown statue in the corner? it’s freaking me out”

“what? we dont have a kid. take our clown statue and get out of the house right now”

qoa:

no offense but…..i’m tired of like……………not being stunningly beautiful